Mainly Void Thoughts

First time I’m writing a book review, so I’ll start off with a caveat actually. Similar to the one the author gives himself, funnily enough!

When it comes to your own security or the security of those you hold dear, do not take any advise at face value. Make sure it actually works when you do need to use it. Everything that is written or that you see is not necessarily true. Just because it is in a book or on TV doesn’t mean it is half as good as they make it out to be. Don’t hazard your own or others lives on something you haven’t tested!

Having said that, I find this book to give a very interesting insight into the minds and behaviours of various types of personas that may want to try to take your worldly possessions (or life) off your hands.

Here we have a book written by Sgt. Rory Miller, a guy who has worked, and still is, in high security prisons as a security guard. His resume is impressive, but it is already in the book so if you’re curious, read the book. Let’s just say, I personally think he has the qualifications to speak on the subject.

There is a big discrepancy to what is taught in a regular dojo versus what you may encounter outside the dojo. Firstly, in the dojo, you are training with your mates. They usually won’t try to hurt you, at least not too badly. Even if they do swing a sharp blade at you, their behaviour is slightly different to how they would swing at someone unknown to them, who they do mean to harm. It would be highly unusual if they actually tried to do you physical harm in the dojo. This difference is what underpins the entire book and goes through, in high detail why this is, what you will found “on the outside” and what you really need to consider when you run into the really nasty people who have zero regard for your (and others) life.

Believe what you will about your fellow man, but do remember, you are quite possibly entirely wrong when you place any assumptions on how someone will behave when faced with a life threatening situation. Including your own self. There is no substitute for experiencing a situation where your life depends on your immediate, accurate and correct response. Not even training in a dojo where you’ll have a whole bunch of others (usually friends) who attack you.

This is highlighted very much throughout the book, and one assumption after another is torn to shreds. I especially find the chapter on predators a big eye opener. I mean, you try to think the best of people, but there is some seriously screwed up people out there too. It reminded me why I do train, and it will make me train both slightly differently as well as harder.

In any case, if you do train in a dojo and you have never really been in a fight on the streets, then you should really read this book. If you train for competition and think you can stand on your own two feet in a fight, you should really read this. There is nothing like deceiving yourself into believing you can take on anyone, anytime, anywhere. Reality is, you may not even see them coming.

So, read this, as it definitely has opened my eyes. It has given me some ideas and has certainly changed my training.

You can find it here: http://www.amazon.com/Meditations-Violence-Comparison-Martial-Training/dp/1594391181/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1292788459&sr=1-1

One thing that people usually forget is that everything you have learnt and will learn in life can be applied not just to the subject matter in which is was learnt, but in any other subject matter you encounter in life. You can learn something about cars and use that same principle in lots of other areas too, if you just listen to the lesson and grasp the principle behind it.

As you probably know, I train in a Martial Art. How can principles learnt while fighting someone be applied to anything else in life? It’s quite simple really. All you really need is a little bit of imagination. I will here touch on three completely different subject areas, but I will take one principle and apply it appropriately to each area. Let’s pick a lesson from Martial Arts, then apply some imagination and then I’ll let you use your own imagination as we take that same lesson into something every human thinks about, sex.

Yes, you read that right! I’m sure you’re now thinking that this will end up being some sado-masocisthic blog post, right? Not at all. Quite on the contrary actually! The subject areas could really be anything, but this may show you some contrasts and commonalities and how your own imagination can transform your life.

When you start training in a Martial Art, you’ll be shown basics and you’ll likely be told that the basics are the most important techniques you’ll learn. Practice your basics and higher level techniques will then also become better. I can tell, your imagination is already skipping forward. So, hang in there and we’ll get to that in a moment.

So, let’s use our imagination a bit and consider the above fact. If you really think of it, the above statement holds true in anything you want to get better in. It could be some topic at work, some sport you train or compete in, even cooking. Take each component in whatever subject matter you wish and you will see that if you can get the basics right and improve your skills the end result will also be so much better, right?

Take this into the context of being with your partner then. Remember your first kiss? It was probably shit if you think of it objectively. But through the years, hopefully, you get more chances to practice that technique and eventually your skills in kissing someone improves. Should you stop trying to get better? Nah, why should you? That’s no fun right?

Next thing that your Martial Arts instructor will probably tell you a lot is to slow it down. This is so you can more easily see, feel and understand what the technique itself has to teach you. You’ll find openings in yourself where you are vulnerable, openings in your opponent where you can strike, weird or interesting angles that changes what opportunities you have or not have. It’ll show you at what points you’re doing something right, but more importantly where you are doing something wrong.

Using your imagination next, let’s consider something that a lot of people do. At a certain age you can start driving a car. You’ll be driving in lots of different road conditions and weather conditions. On a dry road it is very easy to keep high speeds and still be in control. Driving fast is not necessarily a mark on you being a good driver. As adverse weather rolls in controlling the car safely becomes harder as it may lose traction a lot sooner and easier. Roads that has water on them are not as safe as a dry road. Roads with icy spots are yet again not as safe as a wet road. Roads with thick ice and a bit of snow on top is less safe again. The key then to drive safely is not to be driving fast, but to drive at a speed where you can safely control your vehicle. Look at Ireland recently. Slow down and you’ll much sooner notice when the road becomes unsafe or when the car is starting to lose traction. If you slow down, you can then control the car and take yourself out of a potentially lethal situation. Driving fast will more than likely get you injured or killed.

Now, if we take this into the realm of sex, I’m sure you can already see direct correlations here. Lads, how many times have you had a woman tell you to slow it down and not just jump in there? Again, slowing things down will make it much easier for you to figure out what makes your partner tick, sigh, squirm and enjoy what you’re doing.

Everyone that starts in a Martial Art will at some stage be told to relax. In the dojo you will find someone that is very rigid and really goes at it with lots of force and strength. Also known as “being martial”. Doing this will probably hold you back eventually and eventually you’ll not progress and get any better at what you do. Your techniques may look good, but you may find yourself getting beaten when ending up sparring or worst case on the streets in a real fight.

Let’s consider a punch, aimed at your belly. Your natural reaction is to tense up as you receive the punch and more than likely you’ll get winded. All because you’re tensing up, you lock up your entire body. Once the air rushes out of your lungs, that fight is over. If you instead relax your abdomen a bit you can absorb a lot of the force and thereby not get winded. As you haven’t locked up your body you can also move out of the way to a much safer position, leading to you staying in the fight or surviving a potentially lethal situation.

Again, taking this into the context of sex, what can you learn here? Well, if you tense up you’re also losing control of your body in this situation as well! It becomes harder to breathe for example. If you relax, you could enjoy the moment for longer and thereby have more stamina and definitely a much nicer experience.

Another thing that is said to us in the dojo is that soke never does the same technique twice. Soke is the japanese word for Grand Master. He is the person who decides what direction the Martial Art is taking and so on. He is therefore a very important person in any Martial Art. But why doesn’t he do the same technique twice? Well, no two situations are the same. Not even if you practice the same technique over and over again. Each time a strike or kick is making its way towards you, there will always be slight differences. Learning to use those differences to ones advantage is a key factor. If you end up on the street in a fight and you expect your opponent to behave in some specific pattern, you’ll end up on the ground bleeding. No person reacts exactly the same as any other person. Not even if the same thing happens twice in a row as they have learnt something from the first time it happened to them.

Let’s consider something that Einstein once said: “The height of insanity is doing the same thing twice and expecting a different outcome.” He mean this in the context of science and expecting different test results from the same tests. Science is very absolute in this regard, but so is expectations, which is a very relative term. In order for you to get a different test result, you have to change the test in some way. Could be simply slightly different mix of ingredients or perhaps adding or removing some component. What is important to understand here is that the second time you do the same thing, the result is already known and can be expected to be just what it was the first time. You should expect this, because others will expect this as well. Something needs to change for it to be different.

Again, this also holds true when it comes to sex. Keep on doing the same thing over and over again become boring. Really boring. Eventually you may even have a schedule when you’ll have sex. Does this sound like fun? Does this sound like something you’ll want to have for the rest of your life? Nah, not only change what you do, but when, how and where. You’ll have lots more fun that way, right?

So, to those of you training in Martial Arts, what other lessons and principles can you apply to your daily life that you learn in the dojo? What lessons from your every day life can you apply to Martial Arts?

Those of you not training Martial Arts, what lessons have you learnt at work that you can use at home?

To all of you, remember this, your imagination is the most powerful force you have at your disposal. You can imagine anything you want and if you work towards that imagined goal, eventually you’ll get there, and as I showed above, there might be some fun along the way too!

Never forget, everything you have learnt so far you can use any way you see fit. All you need to do is being open to new ideas. Both your own and others.

Hopefully this learnt you something, but more importantly I hope this may open new doors in your life and shine a light on that something you want to have improved and given you some ideas on what you can do to get it resolved.

You want to be successful in what you do? You want to “be the best”? You want to have all your dreams come true? Most people tend to answer yes to these questions.

Are you willing to do what it takes to achieve those goals? Are you willing to put in the effort required to get there? Again, most people say yes here too. Only one problem, people generally do not realise the effort they may have to go through and how hard that road might become.

If you take a look at those that are really successful in what they do, no matter what it is they do, you’ll find a few select things they all have in common. First and foremost is the fact that they just never quit, never give up, no matter what they are faced with. They get knocked on the head and fall down, they’ll be right up on their feet again, getting back in there again, again and again.

I’ve heard a couple of quotes which fit very well in here, and I’ll also add a video, which actually is the reason I’m posting this in the first place. Take these quotes and remember them, saying them to yourself when you’re starting to falter. Because you will falter. We all do at some stage.

“There is no failure, only feedback.” – Milton H Erickson

“It’s not how many time you fall down, it’s how many times you get back up again.” – Unknown, references appreciated!
“Fall seven times, stand up eight.” ~Japanese Proverb

“We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender [...]” – Winston Churchill [Full speech]

“Do it with a smile!” – Sensei (you know who you are, Domo arigato)

Now, here’s the video.

As I train in Bujinkan, a Martial Art in which we have no competitions or tournaments, it is often made the distinction between Martial Arts and Martial Sports. Difference here is that a Martial Sport you hit to score points. In a Martial Art you hit to survive, leaving only the winner standing. As you then train Budo, you train to survive.

At least this is the argument a lot of people are putting forward. I’m not disagreeing on that point either, but I do think it is somewhat limiting the scope. Personally, I don’t think that fully encompasses what Budo means to me.

I can look at a technique or a kata and it is very easy to see what effects this has on an opponent. What I find very interesting is to take the same principle that is taught and apply this to an every day situation. More than likely it is in a non-fighting situation too. I have done this on a couple of occasions, and what I have found is that if you stick to that principle, moving towards the goal you have in mind, it will work just as well as it does in the Dojo.

There’s a few lessons in those statements. The absolutely first one is: “If you train Budo, you train to live” ..

In my book, “to survive” is “to live”, and as I noted above, you can extend the knowledge you gain from training into your everyday life. If you do, you will gain much more happiness in life as well as finding it so much easier to reach the goals you set yourself in life.

“To survive” implicitly implies that you are struggling. It appears as a snapshot of a certain time where you might face hardship. Do you face this everyday? No, not really, and if you do, perhaps it is time for a change?

“To Live” implicitly also implies that there are struggles, but as one part of your life, not all of your life. It also implicitly implies you have good things happening in life and that it is for those things you actually live life. Surviving therefore becomes a core part of wanting to live, and that life is the ultimate goal. Surviving therefore is a stepping stone to allow you to go and do the things in life that are precious to you. The struggle you face to get there will also help you define what those precious things are. By no means to I mean to belittle that journey as it is one that defines you. Whether or not you train a Martial Art or Martial Sport, you are on that path too. We all have struggles in our lives. If you train Budo you learn to acknowledge those struggles, learning from them to make you stronger the next time you face them. In turn, you learn all sorts of things along the way.

What you learn and how you manage those “lessons” are all up to yourself. This is why various masters will say that “you walk your own path” (or “Way”). This doesn’t mean you’re straying from what anyone else is doing, but that the struggle is all your own and that you have to face it, all on your own. What you see and do are all yours to see and yours to do. Nobody else can walk in your shoes and decide how your life should become.

Hopefully, you’ll also learn to treat others with a newfound respect. How come? Well, it becomes easier for you to acknowledge “others also face their own struggles, who am I to deprave them of such a great experience?” ..

It might teach you how to truly respect another human being for their own achievements. No matter how big or small it is, it is still an achievement. Each of those deserve their own recognition.

It might teach you to persevere when you are getting depressed over the path your life has taken you. Allowing you to better “dig on and keep on going”.

It might teach you to smile in any situation, taking life as it comes along, passing you by as you walk along. Allowing you to ignore things in life which would otherwise perhaps “drag you down”, irritate, annoy or perhaps even pull you off your intended goals in life.

So, no I don’t agree that Budo is about “Survival” but it sure is about “Life”.

Budo is Life.

Here is a video I think is fitting for this post. Those that only see people fighting each other, look and look again. To you I want to say “What if there was only one person there? Fighting themselves? Why would they do that?”. Unfortunately, this is what we all do from time to time. Consider this and ask yourself “How come I fight myself, my loved ones or those I care for?”. There is more than one way to fight than just using hands or feet.

In life one runs across cross roads here and there. Some small, some big and then there’s the ones that are so big you have no idea where they might take you. You’re just not able to see where either direction is heading, you can only see a small distance either way. It is very easy then to stop dead in your tracks, wondering what the heck to do next. I’ve been essentially sitting in one of these cross roads for some time now.

But what does one do, really, when you try to make up your mind on something that is really big in your life? You sit there and “weigh your options”, right? But eventually, you simply just pick one, based on how you feel about the choices laid out before you. Sure, logically you can say one choice is better than some other choice, but in the end, this has turned into an emotional thing.

I guess this is why I’ve recently been feeling a bit down. I’ve got a couple of things I need to decide on, and I honestly do not want to decide. Well, it is not that I do not know what I want. But what I truly want I cannot achieve at this point in time. At the same time, I must do something. In the end, this just feeds frustration and a feeling of helplessness.

In my martial arts training I keep on hearing a mantra. A mantra which goes “keep on moving, don’t stop”. If you break this down into it’s bare, raw and actually scary form, then one thing stands out. Direction as such is less important than moving in and off itself. Yes, direction has an outcome on the end result, but standing still will have an even worse end result.

I’ve made up my mind anyway and I’m picking a direction, because staying where I am I will only be hurting my self. What I can’t do today will have to wait until tomorrow. In the meantime I’ll simply build up to a point where it is possible.

Sounds simple once at the end, right?

Keep on moving! Ganbatte Kudasai!

I’ve always found it fun to watch how people behave, trying to guess their next move, deciphering a glance, nod, smile or hunched posture.

Even more so these days. It’s quite amazing what you can see just by judging someones body language. How they look at someone, position of their hands, tilting of the head, how they smile. Is it a friendly smile? Doubtful look? Protective posture or open and inviting?

There are so many cues and clues, even if you observe someone at afar. The way someone dresses says a lot, but their movements says so much more. I especially find eyes giving away much more about what someone really thinks than any other body part. But, to get the full picture you really need to be in a position where you can observe the full body of who you’re curious about.

Are they lying or holding back something? What exactly makes me believe that? Shoulders tense? Eyes not focused on who they speak with? Fidgetting? Is it nervousness? Shyness? Purely trying to evade the subject?

You often don’t need to hear the conversation even. That is why “action speaks louder than words”. Your body has already acted and spoken. Probably before you even formulated what you wanted to say. This is especially true if someone is very attracted to whoever they have their attention on or in a violent situation where someone is about to attack another individual.

Awareness of your surroundings are very important. Consider when you’re in a meeting for example. You’re all of a sudden acutely aware of how others hold themselves, if you’re in the meeting with something to gain or lose at least. If it is a meeting where you are likely to be bored of your skull, that is also quite noticeable, even if you don’t think so. Pay attention, your boredom may be noted by someone senior. Pay attention, the others around the table may reveal some vital clue which may give you an advantage in a sales pitch.

It is also a superb way to make sure you can stay out of harms way. Ever walked into a room and things just didn’t feel right? Did you stay or did you leave? Ever noticed someone looking suspicious while you were walking down the street? How did they behave and what made you think they are suspicious?

Alex Meehan has an excellent post where he gives his advice on what beginners in Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu could pick up as initial reading material. He also gives some background on how Martial Arts teachings have been handed down through the years. He also digs into why reading a book on various techniques just won’t give you the same understanding of the teachings.

It’s an excellent read that I highly recommend.

You should then read this excellent post over at Warrior Fitness ..

It shows how you can get fit by exercising in a few minutes per day. Exercise while watching TV, do push up and read a book at the same time or something similar. all you really need to start getting fit is finding 5-10 minutes a day and start using that little bit of time to start you off.

If you’re finding motivation lacking, do get in touch with me and I can help you with that too.

Ouch, that seems a tad morbid perhaps but let me explain why I’d write about such a topic. Over the last couple of weeks I’ve essentially been knocked out, having been in hospital for most of this time undergoing surgery, twice. Not really my idea of how to enjoy some time off work.

During these couple of weeks I’ve been almost constantly in pain and it has made me realise some of the qualities pain has and the difference between a short lasting stab of pain versus something that just doesn’t go away, no matter how good drugs the hostpial has. These qualities hold some interest to me though as a Martial Artist but also as a fellow human being. It is now much more easy for me to understand people who live with pain in their everyday life and how it affects them.

For example, pain can completely debilitate you. It can in some cases even paralyze you. Ever had that sharp pang when you try to reach down to the ground because you wanted to pick something up you dropped? That pang which makes you suddenly freeze right where you are, not daring to move the slightest as then this pain may return, or if it is still there, get worse?

So, what else did I realise?

Pain can:

1. paralyze an individual. Both partially and fully.
2. prevent certain movement, essentially making the receiver crippled.
3. warn the receiver that if they don’t move out of harms way, this thing is gonna get a heck of a load worse.
4. wear out the energy of the receiver.
5. infuriate and anger.
6. blind the receiver, either by simply closing the eyelids due to a sharp pang or temporarily actually loosing sight for a brief moment as the brain shuts down any neural input in order to cope and survive the current situation.

Some of the above are fairly straightforward, I hope. I’m now hearing a lot of readers thinking that all of those are bad, apart from the third one. Well, that is your call to make really. To be quite honest, all of the above are useful to consider if you do train any Martial Arts, as all of them can be used if you do get attacked. None of these are actually only “bad”. Think of the last item. If your brain decides to shut down your eye sight, you have probably just had a major trauma. The body does things like this in order to protect itself, simply shutting down things it cannot currently deal with, because there are more important things to handle. Your brain doesn’t want to be bogged down with input once it realises it needs to put its full attention to one part of your body. Makes sense really, doesn’t it.

Another aspect of being in constant pain is the sleep deprivation that goes along with it. Most I’ve slept in one go is 5 hours and that was just the once. Mostly I’ve slept 3-4 hours at a time and then having to battle myself to get back to sleep. Constantly tired and hungry is not fun. But being in constant pain is a lot worse.

If I look at the above list, considering each item, as a Martial Artist it is quite different from how Joe Boggs would consider them. As a Martial Artist all of those are good things, as long as you’re not on the receiving end. Imagine for a moment you do end up in a fight. Causing pain in your opponent is then something that is beneficial to your own survival. If you’re a Martial Artist I think you should consider each point carefully and see how you can make them work in your own training.

What I’ve experienced over the last couple of weeks is not something I wish upon anyone, but I am positive as I write this, there is right now someone else going through the exact same ordeal, somewhere. Which is quite unfortunate, as in truth it could have been prevented. But that is what you get for being a stubborn silly bugger not wanting to accept help from those that can give it to you.

Studying Martial Arts has led me to start looking at a lot of other things as well. There’s a whole batch of things I’m revisiting, new things I’m finding (which aren’t that new really, but rather a few thousand years old), and new ways to look at things. A heck of a lot of things to be honest.

As time permits I try to learn some Japanese. Why? Well, there’s quite a lot of details that dissapear when something is translated to another language. Lots of the interesting things I’m uncovering has their basis in either Japanese culture or Chinese culture. However, learning Chinese is quite a daunting task if you consider the various dialects and major difference between them.

I also study Sun Tzu and the Art of War. Rather, to be more precise, Sun Wu. If you didn’t realise what I just said, I’d suggest that you should really study it. There is a nice 3 volume set which contains 12 books. Translated works of Thomas Cleary : On Strategy and Counsel. It is probably the most amazing set of books I have read, especially considering the original authors have been dead for between one and two thousand years. At least, that’s the assigned time line. Massive amounts of these teachings span even further back in time. Then, once those volumes are completed, I’d recommend reading them again, to better understand it all. Basis for the Art of War is not only how to manage troops and outsmart your opponent, but how you can lead your own life, the life of others and even whole communities, cities or indeed even countries. Much of those teachings are interlinked with the I Ching and the Tao Te Ching.

On a completely different front, which isn’t that different, I’ve also taken up a course in Hypnotherapy. Which is a really powerful way to help people to reach their goals. Extremely useful for those who needs help feeling motivated, have fears or anxieties, want help to lose weight or just about any such thing. No, it’s not a replacement thing for your ordinary doctor. Doctors are great at stitching people together when then have hurt themselves. However, despite lots of studies and research, we humans still do not know a heck of a lot about how our brains work. You know, this little part of the body which also keeps our mental state, our memories, feelings and so on. This is still very much a “magical mystery” to the Western medicine and therefore not very commonly used or trusted, by those doctors anyway. However, “alternative medicine” which also includes Hypnotherapy includes quite a broad range of ways to treat people. Some good, some not so good. I’m now going of on a complete tangent here though. What I wanted to really say though was, by starting to study Martial Arts (note: not Martial Sports) I am learning lots about myself along the way. And yes, the Hypnotherapy is actually linked quite nicely together into my Martial Arts training/studying too …